Monday, June 21, 2010


Sure, it's my fault. Apologies, Snacks, I had no idea your (ex)girlfriend was a literary prude. Lolita is a great novel. Baby fucking is wrong. Have I covered the bases?
One of the most beautiful short stories I've ever read was about a ten year old boy fucking a mechanical doll during the turn of the century; I guess we're both seeking to amend Megan's Law. Also, Lolita IS hot. Don't try and shame the rest of us into denying it. I'm going to go ahead and pass over questions such as "Why do you own Full House DVDs?" and "What kind of pet name is 'Sweet Girl'?" There are meatier posts to address:
Hipsters suck. The culture is built on being shallow, pretentious, and (unconsciously) inexperienced. These are not virtues. The defense of suggesting that they are unique and in any way directly affecting us is embarrassing as well. Hipsters are the next evolution of teens wearing backwards baseball caps...teens wearing flannel...teens picking flowers. Leave it to the lifeguard in his mid twenties to tell people to get a life. Yes, I'm narcissistic, but at least I played sports in school.
Do they deserve our ire? Nah.
Do they deserve any more attention? Please, no.
Good luck with the lady problem, though. I suggest you return in a grovelling position, armed with the Twilight series. Whatever you do, steer clear of analogies.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to watching porn.

1 comment:

  1. This sleepover is sooooooooooo fucked up...

    /sees the veins in the very words.
    //knows no French whatsoever.
    ///Key learnings: Nabokov good. Hipsters bad.

    Obey my dog!