Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Cobblestone Clash

I get bored at work. This is my routine:

1. Establish dominance.
2. Watch kids break the rules.
3. Explain their error and warn against recidivism.
4. Repeat step 2.
5. Lapse into whistling/humming/singing Elvis songs.

Today, this boredom gave birth to a new musical idea. My old high school friends and I used to make up funny songs ("raps") or bits, record them, and distribute the results through our classes. We are planning on having another "recording sesh" soon, so I was in the mood for some silly writing. My joke-baby today was of a street fight set outside an opera house in 1864 between a working class gent and a local senator. I've got a few favorites I would like to try on our available critics.

Aver(age)y Chum: I will break you like a stick!
Senator Skumm: Not before I legislate your dick...with a roundhouse kick!
Avery Chum: Ow! You got me in the ball, but I refuse to fall-
Senator Skumm: Then you shall die!

It's an 1864 street fight...slavery is still right, and we're cool with that!
It's a nineteenth century street fight...I establish my height with a top hat!

Since then ideas have thinned out. I'll take any clever rhyming battle-rap style lines I can get. If you really want to, check out the tube channel for the buddy we record with. Be warned, lots of it has aged poorly.

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