Thursday, March 25, 2010

I Hate Urbandictionary.com


People are fucking morons.

We know this. This website not only confirms that people are morons, but celebrates it. I'm not even going to touch the implicit racism/generally irritating nature of titling this book "Mo' Urban Dictionary." HA HA HA HA! THE WHOLESOME-LOOKING WHITE LADY ON THE FRONT IS SAYING BLACK THINGS! HA. HA. HA.

But the problem with Urbandictionary.com is that it appears to be completely unfiltered. A quick search for my name yields:


"A green fruit whose migratory habits often cause it to move from a Big Mac
to the roof of your local McDonalds.

I flung a pickle at the pimply faced slave behind the Mc Counter
and it stuck to her face.
"

Ha. You thought I was going to put my real name on there. Idiot. Anyway, so far as I know, that's not a definition of a slang term. That's just someone saying something snarky.

The asshole who started this website doesn't have to DO anything. He just lets people post "definitions" of words. This takes no effort and has probably made him rich. I hate him for it. It's like Wikipedia if Wikipedia had no guidance, information or societal value. And was unfiltered and unchecked. You can search for any name and get a bunch of shit like "Bill - A really hot guy," and "Janie - a total fat skank." It's nonsense. It's beyond nonsense. You can even search for actual things that have actual definitions (like "pickle"). You can look up celebrities and get an idiot's version of their bio, complete with commentary from the peanut gallery. If YouTube comments, Facebook walls and Wikipedia all had a mutated ass-baby, it would be Urbandictionary.com.

AND WHAT THE FUCK MAKES IT URBAN?

Is it specific to a city setting as opposed to a rural one? Is "urban" a euphemism for "black" in this context? In which case, a) kinda racist, but more importantly b) none of this shit belongs on there. There's a funny and interesting idea for a website somewhere at the heart of this. But it's not quite there. Kinda like this post.

This is in contrast the inimitable and often quite brilliant Stuff White People Like. This guy similarly compiles popular culture phenomena. But then he writes cleverly and hilariously about them. And it makes fun of white people, which I'm all for.

Stupid-ass honkies.



UPDATE: For what it's worth, this is Aaron Peckham, the founder of urbandictionary.com. He looks exactly like I thought he would.

12 comments:

  1. I don't think "urban" dictionary is is a racial reference at all. Just like urban legends and urban meyer aren't about race.

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  2. First of all, Urban Meyer is ALL about race. Secondly, I only thought that because of the lady's speech bubble. I don't know. I'm probably racist.

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    Replies
    1. You're racist? Shame on you!

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  3. "I'm not even going to touch the implicit racism..."

    /repeatedly touches implicit racism.

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  4. I think this was the least popular post I've written yet. A new low, I'm so ashamed.

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    Replies
    1. You should be ashamed of being racist. If you're true anti-Urban Dictionary person, then don't behave like the people who posted and work on it.

      Delete
  5. It's one of my faves! But I do tend to like my posts heavy on the haterade.

    Also I kind of like/may or may not have used urban dictionary on multiple past occasions...

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  6. "It's like Wikipedia if Wikipedia had no guidance, information or societal value."

    Like Encyclopedia Dramatica.

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  7. Whoa, whoa, hey! I hate Urban Dictionary too. But aren't you behaving like the jerks who who behave on that pathetic website?

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  8. I hate them. It's a pathetic sham of a site and plus they reject any and all smart definitions in favor of the stupid ones.

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    Replies
    1. I couldn't agree more. If you ask me, that website's full of liars. I'm glad that I never participated in actually modeling myself after them.

      Delete