Happy St. Drinking Day!

Oh Danny Boy, the pints, the pints are draining.

St. Patrick's Day: an excuse for grown men and women to act like animals after beginning to consume alcohol excessively at ten in the morning. Do you live on the East Side of Manhattan? God help you.

St. Patrick's Day is fucking wonderful. The Guiness, the Jameson, the music. It's all just beautiful. The idiots puking and pissing in the street at 3 in the afternoon, we could do without. But it's all worth it. The singing, the revelry. It's a delightful shit show.

It's a little strange, though, that the entire holiday is basically an endorsement of public intoxication. Isn't it? If we decided to celebrate, say, the Spring Equinox by having an enormous cocaine party where everyone just snorted blow until their noses bled, it would be considered quite inappropriate. There's this kind of arbitrary distinction that our culture provides.

Are the Irish offended by the way this is celebrated? The stereotype of the drunken Irishman isn't helped by the celebration of St. Paddy's. Especially because it's not just the Irish that use it as an opportunity to get blotto (I should know, I dressed up like a leprechaun at work two years ago). What if on Martin Luther King Jr. Day a bunch of non-Black people dressed up in black-face and spent the day--I don't know--eating fried chicken and watermelon. That'd be offensive as fuck, right?

Is it only offensive because non-Irish people participate as well? Or would it still be fucked up if it was a bunch of only Irish people getting wasted?

This got a little more serious than I'd intended. Still, worth thinking about while you're getting blitzed on car bombs... One more thought: calling drinks car bombs also seems offensive. Considering the history of terrorist violence that Ireland has, it'd be like naming a 4th of July cocktail a Nine-Eleven. FUCKED. UP.

Whatever, enjoy your drinking, you insensitive shitbag drunks.