Thursday, February 25, 2010

How...how could you?

This is Shamu and his trainer. One of the two living things in this picture is no longer alive. Hint: It's not the enormous aquamarine mammal. Shamu killed his trainer. Shamu is a KILLER whale. Shamu...you large glossy Orca...how can you Kill? We put you in a tank and fed you dead fish from a bucket. We gave you the privelege of jumping into the air over and over again for the delight of Floridians. And you repay us with this, the least surprising thing ever.

In fact, it is so unsurprising that this particular version of Shamu had been involved IN THE DEATH OF TWO OTHER TRAINERS. This Killer Whale deserves to be locked up...in a tank full of water! Unlike groundhogs, Killer Whales can not be begrudged their insidious plot to destroy humans, one overly affectionate wetsuit-wearer at a time.

Drew Barrymore is making a movie, and I can think of three people who would disagree...if they were STILL ALIVE.

2 comments:

  1. For what its worth, that whale is black and white not "aquamarine." He is a "marine mammal" if that was your intended meaning.

    /word usage'd

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