Monday, May 17, 2010

No Known Natural Predators

Hey everyone! I'm new here in Pennsylvania but - oh my, it's been sooo long since I've done one of these...
Anyway, my name is Halyomorpha Halys, but you can call me the Brown Marmorated Stink Bug; or Stinky for short.

:P

I just moved here from Asia, and boy are my wings tired! Ha-ha! Seriously, though, I took the first poorly supervised shipping vessel I could find and made myself comfortable. Thanks international commerce! Some people say I 'invaded' but they are just totally jealous of how popular I've become. Haters gonna hate!

So, um, I like to hang out and lay my eggs under Cirsium Arvense. Some people call it Canada Thistle, but I just call it home. I like the way it grows everywhere and really hides my spawn from genocidal natives. They are such a pain, right!? I like to show them who's boss by getting sucked into their vacuums and spraying my unique scent everywhere. They think it's gross but I think it's totally sexy. ;)

Well, I've gotta go reproduce and cause necrosis in some delicious looking local flora, but let me know if you're not doing anything later. All you have to do is look up at your ceiling...
I'll be there. Watching you sleep. <3

1 comment:

  1. Ah, yes. Very common in Htown. We receive many Asian shipments here. All children. How hapless are these bugs? I shall tell you. This is true. Upon sighting a stinkbug, I simply hold a tissue six inches below the specimen and then issue forth a sharp burst of breath. The displaced bug then falls into my swaddling fist. I don't even have the heart to flush most of them. I simply toss them out back, where they are tormented to death by chipmunks. Or cheaply shipped Asian children.

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