Friday, September 3, 2010

The Fuck You Staring At?

Shit look at Newbread, MousePounce. Newbread thinks he goan roll up next to us and just fuggin' READ. First floor first left, son. Room 2A. This where we throw the NAWLIDGE. Newbie don't know the way this row op-er-ates. MousePounce, why don't we tell Newbie here how to operate his fucking shit now that he's in the 1st Grade. Yeah brotractor, I said it. We in the fucking grades now, ranchero. Every fucker in here is looking at a sentence of at least eight years in this building. MousePounce at my feet here? He might get out in 7. MousePounce, he likes them bookz. But he also likes string cheese, so watch your Newbie ass at lunch, or you'll get CheeseFleece'd by MousePounce and damn you get CheeseFleece'd by MousePounce on the first day you goan look STouPID. Better offer him some-a-that though, know'm saying. A little tribute, a little RESPEK. Respek is the stock-in-fucking-trade round here, Newbie.

When teacher asks a question, you fucking raise your Newbie hand if you know the answer. When that bell rings, you shut the fuck up and stare straight ahead. In here, you belong to teacher and other teacher and other teacher and principle. They all got names, but I never learned 'em because I'm too busy being mayor of the baddest row in Room 2A. In here, teacher owns your ass, but in the yard, oh fuck it's so diffs.

That recess yard? That's where we really operate our shit. That's where NAWLIDGE goes to play, son. Newbread, I know you're sittin' there thinkin' "What? Huh?" and that's because you're a stupid-ass Newbread. So I'm gonna tell you one thing that will make or break your time here. Shit defines your Newbie-ass legacy. Ready? This some nawlidge: Push someone. Push someone on the first fuckin' day in the yard, or you'll get pushed erryday till puberty. That's just how it goes. Pick somebody you can push, walk up to them. Say "Hey, I'm new," and then you push that fucker. If they go down, they go down. Don't think about it. Make sure an older kid sees. That's how you start learning how your shit operates, and that's how you know you can hang with me and the Ounce o' Pounce. Taint that straight, MousePounce? Yeah, fucking A right it's straight PounceMaster General. Shit Newbread, is that a Capri Sun?!

1 comment:

  1. Haven't I pushed you enough?

    Did the tight end drill mean nothing?

    /clenches teetch
    //shakes head
    ///drills tight end

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