Thursday, May 16, 2013

A World Without Internet

I am in the process of moving and am going to New Orleans this weekend for Poop Snacks' bachelor party. How we all grow up. Anyway, in the interim between houses, I have no Internet.

All business is conducted from my iPhone. And by "business" I mean, of course, porno watching and various sundry types of whoremongering. 

My world has been reduced to the size of an impeccably HD three inch screen. I'm even writing this post from my phone. And I remember a time when the Internet charged you by the minute and it was through a 14k modem and you couldn't talk on the phone and be online at the same time. And masturbating was really just comprised of the anticipation of waiting for that one fake nude picture of Sarah Michelle Gellar to finish loading.

A simpler time.

Off to the land of gumbo, jazz, and public drunkenness. Adieu.

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